Drunken cookery competition

One of my favourite ways of spending a rainy weekend is to cook a time-consuming though not particularly complicated dish whilst slowly getting drunk. Something like a Bouef Bourgignon with one bottle of wine for the dish and one for the chef. I’ll put some jazz on in the kitchen, Hank Mobley or Mose Allison perhaps, and get chopping and drinking. Hopefully there’ll be enough left in the second bottle for my wife and I to have a glass with the finished dish.

In my student days, I did things rather differently. We had blackened saucepan in the kitchen filled with old oil and after a night at the pub, we’d make chips. Not just chips, pretty much anything would go into that vat of boiling oil, onion rings, sausages, parsips, sometimes I’d spit beer into the oil and watch the explosions. It’s a minor miracle that no one got hurt. I did, however, get quite chubby so there was a consequence to my irresponsibility. When I was sent the Drunken Cookbook (sequel to the best-selling Hungover Cookbook) by Milton Crawford, I immediatly looked for the deep-frying section, nothing tastes better when drunk than deep-fried food. Mr Crawford is, however, a lot more responsible than I was, and warns against deep-frying when drunk. Happily there are lots of other great recipes to try when hammered or even just mildly tipsy. In fact the recipes are graded as to how drunk you could be to attempt them. He’s also mixed in some stories from well-known booze enthusiasts such as Kingsley Amis. It’s fun to cook from or would make a great present for the drunkard in your life.

Square Peg, the publishers, have very kindly offered me three copies to giveaway. Simply let me know your favourite thing to cook when under the influence or even a good anecdote about drunken cookery. I will be consulting with the author and anything that makes us laugh or salivate stands a chance of winning. You can answer below or email me at henry g jeffreys at gmail dot com.


About Henry

I’m a drinks writer. My day job is features editor at the Master of Malt blog. I also contribute to BBC Good Food, the Spectator and others. You can read some of my work here. I’ve done a bit of radio, given some talks and written a couple of books (Empire of Booze, The Home Bar and the forthcoming Cocktail Dictionary).
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2 Responses to Drunken cookery competition

  1. Supping with Supper

    It was quite straightforward. Sausage and mash. I boiled up the potatoes, put some thick sausages under the grill, and opened up a nice bottle of red to go with it. Nice. I sipped it twice, just to taste.

    After six sips, with the sausage sizzling, the mash needed a dash of olive oil. I sloshed some in.

    Six more sips. Turned the sausage. Bashed the mash. Sipped the slosh.

    Tasted the mash. Splashed in a dash. Supped the splosh. Twice. Nice.

    Sipped. Watched. Supped. Botched.

    Sausage, unturned, burned.

    Dash it. Ditch it. Sip and consider it. Mash with… mash, then. Might not miss it.

    Not thick. Oh no. Not sloshed. Not. No. Supped.

    Sipped. Then slipped. Bash. Then crash.

    Mash missed dish. Splosh splashed.

    Dish bished. Mash trashed. Slosh losht.




  2. I suppose I have 2 stories.. One been the classic fishfinger sarny hankering when drunk…. I’m afraid they both start with Another party in halls and it was the end of the night and I’d spied some birds eye fish fingers in breadcrumbs… Students don’t usually have Birdseye so I was all over them bang in the oven and there I sat and sat and sat waiting for them to cook, felt like an eterneity.. Some hours later I woke in a panick stumbled to the oven in horror that I’d fallen sleep to drunk to wait and was worried of burn the place down. Turns out I hadent even switched the bloody oven on!
    Story 2 back in days when we use drink jäger not as a bomb but starlight out he bottle (the kids think they own it but we had it long before them) any way one of the guys fancied a chicken stir fry and we all thought it would be good to maranate the chicken in out fave drink… Needless to say it tasted like medicne!!

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